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Monthly Archive: June 2012

Jun 27

The super dooper diary of a thirteen year old

ermahgerd wern dererkshern

I recently found my diary from when I was 13 years old. “Oh how exciting…. NOT,” I hear you all proclaim. I had similar thoughts, and was just about to give it to my step-daughter who’s almost 13 to read for a laugh, when I thought it prudent to read it first.  Given that I …

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Jun 16

How to achieve the perfect Daddy tantrum

If you’ve read The toddler guide to tantrums and How to achieve the perfect Mummy tantrum then, no doubt, you’ve been eagerly anticipating instructions on how to achieve the perfect Daddy tantrum. How to achieve the perfect Daddy tantrum A tantrum should generally follow these lines: 1. Anger at something – Your team lost their game You’ve run out …

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Jun 15

How to achieve the perfect Mummy tantrum

tantrumyoga

If you read The Toddler Guide to Tantrums you’re probably wondering if there’s any way to stop a tantrum before it starts. Why yes, yes there is.  Get in first! Finding that your kid’s ears are painted on?  Tried speaking calmly, cajoling, begging and eventually shouting to get them to behave? Nothing working? When your kids …

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Jun 14

The toddler guide to tantrums

demotivational-poster-0cbd3kk6r2-temper-tantrums

As every evil Overlord knows, unpredictability is a trait that keeps your Minions on their toes.  They should never be able to guess your schedule or motives in case they try to thwart your dastardly plans. If you find that you have been a little slack in this department lately, then your only option is …

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Jun 10

Actress, rock-diva or porn star

rootintoeurope

A few months before I made the move from England to New Zealand, I had the opportunity to be an extra on the first episode in a television series.  Naturally my friends and I jumped at the chance, because it was bound to put us on the path to stardom. We were an unlikely lot …

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Jun 06

Lump on my jubblies

mammogram cartoon

A few weeks ago I decided it was time to wake up and smell the children (the roses in my garden don’t smell, but my children most certainly do). I realised that you can’t look after others when you’re not looking after yourself, so I made an appointment to see my doctor about the lump I’d …

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